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Funny Little Pregnant Things, by Emily Doherty

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"Hello, I want to start by letting you know I am not a doctor or any sort of professional in the field of babies and will not be giving any medical advice in this book. So if you are wondering why you keep sweating through your clothes and every sheet you own, you may want to get a different book. This book is not designed to tell you the “best” way to do anything. You’ll have plenty of people telling you, “This is how I did it and my way is, in fact, the best.” Newsflash—all pregnancies are different, and so are the babies they produce. “They,” whoever “they” are, seem to change the rules each year anyway. “Microwave your deli meat. Never mind, just use caution while eating. Feel free to gain lots of weight while pregnant. Actually, we are only going to budget you twenty pounds. Have a martini and a cigarette, it will help you relax—whoops, we got that one wrong.” So what exactly is this book, and why as a working mom with a two-year-old and a three-week-old have I decided to write it? First, the why. As a mom-to-be, I read a few of the prerequisite pregnancy books, and although factual, I found most of them to be very dull. When chapter 3 let me know my baby was now the size of lemon, I gave up. Where was the good stuff? After having two babies, I realized these books left out so many little details that you would only know if you had delivered a child. Details that are very important. For example, beware of the baby registry and all the crap you will never use, or be prepared to get breast milk all over everything you own! At least provide me with a pregnancy book with some humor, then maybe I can make it to chapter 6, where my baby now resembles a melon. In order to help those like me, who want some realistic tips in an easy-to-read fashion, this book is an account of some of the ridiculous things you may encounter while pregnant. It also includes “the good stuff” people forget to mention. For example, there is a greater-than-average chance you will sh——t yourself while giving birth. (Pregnancy—whoever said it would be easy.)"
- Sales Rank: #3385611 in Books
- Published on: 2014-01-17
- Released on: 2014-01-17
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.00" h x .19" w x 6.00" l, .27 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 74 pages
Review
"Brutally honest and laugh-out-loud funny, with chapters short enough to read between trips to the bathroom, this is a welcome addition to the expectant parent’s bookshelf.”
―Booklist
“A no-holds-barred and funny glimpse into all things pregnancy, Funny Little Pregnant Things made me cringe and laugh, sometimes at the same time. Doherty covers gritty, grimy, intimate bodily changes, baby prep, and life post-child with candor and humor. I thought I knew everything there was to know from my girlfriends and other books―but Doherty’s book is a much better resource!”
―Lori Green LeRoy, author of The Inadequate Conception From Barry White to Blastocytes
"As a mom of two, this fantastic book had me laughing out loud. Emily Doherty is brilliant at 'telling it how it is' when it comes to the mysteries of pregnancy. If you feel like laughing, or know someone who's expecting, pick up this hilarious, quick read. You won't regret it!"
―Jill Kelsey, editor, First Time Parent magazine
About the Author
Emily Doherty is a full-time working mother of two. A graduate of Northeastern University and once an avid rugby player, she is driven to succeed. She is currently a director of mutual fund sales for MFS Investment Management, where she has spent the last eight years educating financial advisors as well as doing public presentations on the stock market and other investment related topics. When she is not traveling around the state of Virginia and Washington DC, Doherty is at home with her husband, Patrick, raising her two young sons, Cullen and Lachlan.
Most helpful customer reviews
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Just skimmed through a few chapters and can quickly say this is funny, witty
By Amazon Customer
Had the lucky opportunity to get this book from the author herself! Thanks for the book and just in time since I'm 38 weeks already! I know, probably shouldn't be in the desert at a concert festival but imagine the potential birth story! Just skimmed through a few chapters and can quickly say this is funny, witty, and straight to the point. Lots of good tips and happy to report I learned something new despite a ton of unsolicited advice. Can't wait to share it with friends!
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Hilarious and so true!
By Sarah Roy
By far the best pregnancy book out there! While I was waddling around 8 months preg, feeling like a whale and taking life way too seriously, I found this book and it saved my sanity. I was laughing out loud and sharing the stories with my husband and friends. Why can't all Mommy To Be books be this entertaining??
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Great gift for your pregnant friends
By Stephanie Edwards
This fun book is a perfect gift for your pregnant friends.
One mothers true and funny tales of just the very beginnings of parenthood.
A nice break from what all the "experts know" about surviving pregnancy.
See all 14 customer reviews...
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